Children and death could be a very sensitive subject to touch on. Does a child actually know what is going on? I would definitely think they do, but of course considering the cognitive development of a child, it would not be a way that we would think of first.
I was a very fortunate as a child not to experience death. However, before I was born my family had. My mother had lost her first born about three weeks after her birth. Kira-Lynn looked like a perfectly healthy baby however her heart was basically on the wrong side of her body meaning that her time on earth would be limited.
Growing up my parents never hid the fact that there was a child before my sister and I. Her baby photos where on display and my mom always left any topic open for discussion. I remember being completely fascinated that I had a sister in heaven. To me she was an angel in my life, she always had my back and looked out for her younger sister. I remember fascinating over what she would be like if she was still alive. What would she look like? Would I have a better relationship with her than I did with my sister?
I remember a day when I was brought to see her grave in Port Hardy. Seeing where she was buried had not impacted me nearly as much as the open discussions I had with my mother. To me the plaque was just a stone in the ground that marked a name. Maybe I was a little nervous about the idea that there was dead bodies everywhere in the cemetery there may be a chance that they would come through the earth to get me (I had an odd fascination with scary movies, and a very vivid imagination). But to me the idea of her presence took precedence over a marker in the ground. She will always be with me, we will always be hanging out as sisters do.
Today I can only imagine the heartbreak that could accompany what happened to my parents 29 years ago. I do not think a day goes by without my mom thinking about her. What mother could not? For me, since she was not physically in my life, I do not. But since I was a child, death to me meant another person who could somehow be closer to me.
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